Most college-bound students put a huge amount of time and effort into researching colleges and preparing college applications but very few consider the fact that the transition to college might derail their plans. In many cases, students assume that getting in is the hard part and it will be smooth sailing as soon as they get to campus. Unfortunately, this assumption may allow college freshmen to be blindsided by homesickness, roommate problems, depression, or even sexual assault.
Before heading off to college, students can arm themselves for a successful transition by heeding the advice of experts like Harlan Cohen, Speaker and Author of The Naked Roommate: And 107 Other Issues You Might Run Into in College and The Naked Roommate: For Parents Only. In his book for students, Cohen offers 107 tips that can help students remain happy, safe, and balanced throughout that tough first semester of freshman year. On Page 6 of The Naked Roommate, he explains:
College is a huge transition. And transitions are naturally uncomfortable at times. Fighting uncomfortable just creates more discomfort. But facing it and working through it is how we get comfortable with the uncomfortable.
Here are four statistics that show why it’s critically important to prepare for the transition to college:
- 71.4% of surveyed freshmen “frequently” or “occasionally” felt lonely or homesick according to the Higher Education Research Institute at UCLA, Cohen 47.
- About one-third of U.S. college students had difficulty functioning in the last 12 months due to depression, and almost half said they felt overwhelming anxiety in the last year, per the 2013 National College Health Assessment.
- According to the film The Hunting Ground, 23% of undergraduate women are sexually assaulted while in college.
- As many as 1 in 3 first-year students won’t make it back for sophomore year according to the Freshmen Retention Rate published by U.S. News and World Report.
Here are 10 Dos and Don’ts to help you beat the statistics and successfully navigate the transition to college.
#1 DON’T let “summer melt” derail your college plans.
- Anywhere from 10 to 40 percent of students presumed to be headed to college fail to matriculate at any postsecondary institution in the fall following high school.
- Make sure your acceptance leads to matriculation: don’t fall behind on college paperwork, financial aid forms, or tuition payments.
- Get help from your college if you encounter problems. Don’t wait! And don’t procrastinate!
Learn more about Summer Melt by listening to this NPR Hidden Brain podcast.
#2 DO use the summer to prepare for a smooth start to freshman year.
- Carefully read everything that your school sends you:
- Sign-ups for roommate preferences, housing, academic programs, medical/insurance information
- Freshman orientation, and especially, pre-orientation options and sign-ups
- Information about registering for classes
- Contact the Financial Aid Office to confirm your financial aid offer, then have a meeting with your parents about responsibilities and your college budget.
- Reach out to your roommate if you are paired in the summer.
- Make travel arrangements early in summer, and plan how to send your stuff.
#3 DO use Harlan Cohen’s 3 P’s to “face the uncomfortable and make it safe.” (The Naked Roommate by Harlan Cohen, 7th Ed., 2017)
- PEOPLE: “For every problem, question, or concern you’ll need FIVE people on campus who can help you…distance yourself from the haters and surround yourself with the lovers.” (Cohen 35)
- PLACES: Identify THREE places for connection and community on campus, “get involved, join something, and meet as many people as possible.” (Cohen 27)
- PATIENCE: Allow time to make real friends, don’t jump to transfer after one semester, and “give yourself permission for the first year to be uncomfortable at times.” (Cohen 32)
#4 DON’T expect your roommate to be your best friend.
- 48.9% of students surveyed reported frequent or occasional difficulty getting along with roommates (Higher Education Research Institute, UCLA)
- Be proactive! Set up room rules BEFORE you need them.
- Talk about tough issues: borrowing stuff, quiet time, overnight guests, sex in the room, cleanliness, alcohol and drugs, noise. Be honest!
- Recognize the symptoms of depression, and get help for a roommate engaged in self-destructive behavior, whether they want it or not.
#5 DON’T be blindsided by homesickness.
- With almost 3/4 of freshmen reporting feelings of homesickness (UCLA, cited above), first year students should expect and prepare for a strong emotional reaction to separation from home and family.
- Expect the strongest homesickness to hit mid-fall.
- Beware of overusing technology and missing out on finding your people and places on campus.
- Beware of using alcohol or drugs to blunt the uncomfortable feelings.
- The cure for homesickness is to accept the feelings and work to “make your new home more comfortable.” (Cohen 48)
#6 DON’T try to do it all alone — academic demands can overwhelm!
- Arrive early to class, sit in front, and ask questions.
- Introduce yourself to your professor.
- Prepare readings before class and review your notes afterward.
- Attend office hours — not just once, but as often as possible! — and exam review sessions.
- Talk to upperclassmen about professors and how to prepare for tests; borrow hand-me-down books; look at their old exams.
- Most importantly: Join study groups or form your own. At many schools, professors give more homework than one person can reasonably do alone, with the expectation that it will lead to collaboration. You can share notes, work together on problem sets, pool resources, and make good friends in the process!
#7 DON’T hide in your dorm room.
- The way to find friends is to get out where you can be found; don’t depend on your roommate for your social life.
- Join student clubs — expand a current interest and/or find a new one.
- Join an intramural sport — have fun with inner tube water polo, Quidditch, or Ultimate Frisbee, and avoid the freshman fifteen.
#8 DO take advantage of university and college resources.
- Find out what your school offers for academic support; many schools offer math tutoring and essay-writing support centers.
- Your RA lives right down the hall, don’t hesitate to get to know him or her, and ask for support when you need it.
- Investigate the Office of Student Support Services: find out about mental health and emotional support offerings before you need them.
#9 DO get organized and manage your time.
- Use a calendar to plan course requirements and homework for the term or semester; work backward from exams and due dates to plan homework hours.
- Be careful in the early days of each term, when it seems like nothing is due — you should still have about 2-3 hours of homework for every hour of class.
- Consider a time management tool like the Pomodoro Technique to stay on task without burning out.
#10 DO be vigilant during the “red zone” for sexual assault.
- The beginning of the school year is also the beginning of what is known as the “red zone” — a period of six weeks that experts believe is the most dangerous time for campus sexual assault, when more than 50% of rapes occur.
- Know the facts about sexual assault:
- 84% of victims know their assailants
- 90% of all sexual assaults involve alcohol (Cohen 479)
- If you attend a campus party where alcohol is served, make sure that you leave with every member of the group you arrived with.
- Learn about hookup culture, and make an informed decision about whether you want to participate — fully 1/3 of college students are NOT hooking up according to Lisa Wade, author of American Hookup; listen to the Hidden Brain podcast, Just Sex, for a report on casual sex on college campuses.
One last morsel of expert advice before you head off to college:
“Relax. Have fun. Enjoy every minute. When you expect the unexpected, everything is an adventure.”
–Harlan Cohen
